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 Post subject: Press Release
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:26 pm 

Joined: Fri Jan 18, 2008 9:09 pm
Posts: 476
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Islo, January 29, 2008 -- Blue Faction pilot Trystero today announced the opening of Clandestine Greetings Ltd., with corporate headquarters on Islo. Trystero will be Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of the new company.

"Our mission statement really says it all," said the new CEO. "It is our business to proactively initiate innovative solutions so that we may professionally utilize low-risk high-yield catalysts for change while maintaining the highest standards."

According to Trystero, the company will enter the market in two phases. Phase I will involve an extensive R&D effort. The preeminent ergonomics and anatomy experts in Skytopia are being recruited to help us develop best-in-class handshakes; while leaders in the fields of encryption, steganography, and security countermeasures are being tapped to create technologies for maximum secrecy. By the end of Phase I, CGL expects to have a line of secret handshakes suitable for everyone from the smallest no-girls-allowed treehouse club to the most paranoid tyrannical government.

The company will then enter Phase II, which Trystero said should be a long and prosperous era of distribution and expansion. In addition to sales of the secret handshakes themselves -- off the shelf or uniquely tailored to a particular organization's needs -- there are plans on the drawing board for all manner of accessories, accoutrements and peripherals. "Some of our secret handshakes may require the use of a prehensile tale," said Trystero, "so we will be making prosthetic versions of that appendage available for those who lack one. We expect to do significant business in training seminars and videos. And an extensive franchising plan is being put together to enable entrepreneurs throughout Skytopia to get into the business of providing world-class secret handshakes. Applications will be available soon.

"Every organization -- families, corporations, underground rebel forces, mystical cults, and others -- can benefit from having one or more secret handshakes, and Clandestine Greetings Ltd. aims to be the one-stop source for everybody's secret handshake needs."

Address inquiries to:
Trystero
Chairman and CEO
Clandestine Greetings, Ltd.
Islo


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